Just going to stand there and watch me burn....

Before we begin, listen to this song.


I love this song.

It's one of my favorite song for the last three months.

I wish I could write down all the lyrics - both for you - and for myself. Because I re-read my blogs several times. I'm sure that's why I write them. I don't read anything that isn't a good read. Damn girl, that's narcissism for you.

It's difficult to explain why I'm sharing this song with you. I was horrified when I first saw this song - both the video and hearing the lyrics. It's so provocative - but its true. The emotion part of it.

The anger. The pain. The helplessness.

"...Here we go again
It's so insane
Cause when it's going good
It's going great
I'm Superman
With the wind in his bag
She's Lois Lane
But when it's bad
It's awful
I feel so ashamed
I snap..."

I've been listening to Eminem because of my sister for over 15 years. All of his songs are violent and graphic. Fantasies of killing his wife, his ex and dumping their bodies in the trunk of his car....but this....I never heard so much raw pain in any of his songs...but I do have a notoriously bad memory.

I like the symbolism of the burning house (video)....with the girl tied to the bed when its burning (lyrics). When couples fight...its different from family members fighting. You can never break bonds with your sister or father...even with a decade of silence. But your significant other....the one you've chosen to make a 'house' with...when you fight with them....you feel the insides of your 'house' burning....

"...Now I know we said things
Did things
That we didn't mean
And we fall back
Into the same patterns
Same routine
But your temper's just as bad
As mine is
You're the same as me
But when it comes to love
You're just as blinded
Baby please come back
It wasn't you
Baby it was me
Maybe our relationship
Isn't as crazy as it seems
Maybe that's what happens
When a tornado meets a volcano
All I know is
I love you too much
To walk away though
Come inside
Pick up your bags off the sidewalk
Don't you hear sincerity
In my voice when I talk
Told you this is my fault
Look me in the eyeball
Next time I'm pissed
I'll aim my fist
At the dry wall
Next time
There will be no next time
I apologize
Even though I know it's lies
I'm tired of the games
I just want her back
I know I'm a liar
If she ever tries to fucking leave again
I'mma tie her to the bed
And set the house on fire..."