Birthday Girl

Today is my birthday.

This was a very hard birthday to celebrate because some of the events leading up to today were really out of control. I was stressed, upset and doing some really wrong things.

But last evening, things automatically fell into place and I now feel like the biggest fool for thinking 48 hours ago that my world is ending. So stupid of me. I feel very small.

One good thing of this entire mess is that I feel much more grateful about the big picture in my life. I'm more grateful for all the non-material treasures I have right now. I truly feel at the moment that the biggest gift I got today was knowing that mh was with me this weekend, at my side, that we are happy, and that my family is safe and healthy. There's nothing else I could have wished more for today.

I spoke to both my sisters today. I can't descibe how lucky I feel. I even talked to my sister-in-law and mother-in-law and I feel so humbled that they care about me so much. We are planning to get together on memorial day weekend and I am really looking forward to that.

And of course, my mother is visiting. Its really, really nice to have her here.

I didn't get a chance to talk to my brother and father. I think my brother has forgotten but I'm sure my father hasn't .... he probably didn't get a chance to call - I think. He did send me a candle decoration. He always sends me something for my house. Last year it was silver coasters. I find that so unlike my father - shopping for home decoration items for me. :)

So, this year, as I grow one more year older, I truly feel myself age. Birthdays are always humbling because you find out that you have so much more than you realize.